By Karen Crawford
Prodigals International Senior Program Director

Partners in Process Support Groups provide a safe place of healing for women who have been affected by their husband’s or partner’s sexual brokenness. These support groups give women the opportunity to walk through the Twelve Step process in Christian community.

A key truth our mentor-led groups instill in every woman is that she DID NOT CAUSE her partner’s behavior. Mentors are women who have walked through the full Twelve Steps through being active members of a Partners in Process support group and individually with a Sponsor. They know first hand the pain and agony of sexual betrayal. They are compassionate, Jesus-loving women, who are dedicated to coming alongside other women facing the same struggles.

Twelve Step fellowships are completely anonymous groups where you attend a weekly group and work on your pain and your struggles. The focus is on you not your spouse/partner. These groups are very effective when the Twelve Traditions are followed strictly and the members are actively working the steps in the group and in their daily life. Group members are learning the Scriptural foundations of each step, becoming educated about each step and how it applies to being a woman who struggles with codependency in their relationship with their husband/partner who simultaneously is struggling with their sexual brokenness. Each group meeting also includes time for each woman to share about her current struggles, how she is working through a step, and the transformative healing work God is doing in her body, mind, and heart.

“The group has been so encouraging, and I’ve found confidence and hope for my future. All the women are so wonderful there and it’s been so wonderful to be able to be around others who can relate to what I’ve been through and am going through.” Tina

Additionally, group members have the opportunity to work through the steps with a peer Mentor. These individual meetings give a woman the opportunity to unpack her pain and brokenness with reliable support from a Jesus-loving woman who understands this journey.

The Twelve Steps bring a woman back to her foundation of who she believes God is. As we seek God for the answer to our problems, with the help of our Group and Mentor, we can see our issues through new lenses. We have support within the context of an understanding community for the times when we hit a bump, whether big or small, in our life that trips us up and triggers our pain.

Our goal with each Partners in Process support group is to help women find their voice, gain strength and perspective, and find a renewed sense of hope and a path forward by building supportive friendships with women who are walking through similar struggles.

Partners in Process offers both online groups and geographically-based groups. Our Partners in Process peer-Mentors have walked through this process and are available to help you find your source of healing through God’s unlimited love for you. To get a glimpse of what you’ll experience through attending a Partner’s in Process group, listen to our podcast of Karen and Heather’s story.

“Thanks to my Partners in Process 12 Step Group, I have a renewed relationship with God. I often call the 12 steps Basic Christianity 101. I feel the process of going through the steps has put some of the principles I have heard my whole life in church into plain English with practical applications.” ~ Faye

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Post FAQ’s

1. How do Partners in Process Support Groups provide a safe environment for women affected by their partner’s sexual brokenness, and what role does the Twelve Step process play in this context?

Partners in Process Support Groups create a safe environment through several key elements:

• Shared experiences:  Groups are exclusively for women partnered with men struggling with sexual addiction, fostering a sense of shared understanding and reducing feelings of isolation.
• Anonymity:  Strict anonymity allows women to openly share their struggles without fear of judgment.
• Mentorship:  Groups are led by experienced mentors who have personally walked through the recovery process, providing guidance and support.
• Focus on self-healing:  The Twelve Step process encourages women to focus on their own healing journey, detaching from the responsibility of their partner’s behavior.

2. What are the key qualities to look for when searching for a healthy recovery group, according to the article?

When looking for a healthy recovery group, evaluate the following qualities:

• Christian foundation:  The groups operate within a Christian framework, offering spiritual guidance and support alongside practical tools.
• Focus on the Twelve Steps:  The program actively utilizes the Twelve Step process with a unique focus on betrayal trauma, providing a structured approach to healing.
• Experienced leadership:  Mentors who have personally experienced the recovery journey lead the groups, offering valuable insights and empathy.
• Supportive community:  Groups foster a sense of belonging and understanding among women facing similar challenges.

3. How do these recovery groups support specific audiences, such as women/wives of individuals struggling with sexual addiction and brokenness, and what distinguishes them from groups focused on addiction recovery?

Partners in Process groups cater specifically to the needs of women partnered with men struggling with sexual addiction. They address the unique challenges faced by these women, such as:

• Betrayal trauma:  The program acknowledges the betrayal trauma and the safety seeking behaviors developed in relationships with sex addicts.
• Shame and betrayal:  Groups provide a safe space to process the emotional trauma associated with sexual betrayal.
• Spiritual impact:  The Christian framework offers support in reconciling faith with the experience of sexual addiction. We address church abuse which unfortunately continues to occur in some churches.

These elements distinguish them from general addiction recovery groups, which may not have the specific tools and understanding necessary to address the complexities of trauma resulting from sexual addiction within a relationship.

4. Can you elaborate on the importance of safety, structure, and the principle of “see and be seen” within these support groups, and how do they contribute to the healing process?

• Safety:  Anonymity and a supportive environment create a safe space for women to share their vulnerabilities without fear of judgment.
• Structure:  The Twelve Step process provides a clear roadmap for healing, offering guidance and milestones along the journey.
• “See and be seen”:  Sharing experiences and witnessing the healing journeys of others fosters a sense of connection and hope, promoting individual growth. That growth experienced gives partners a voice in their relationship, which they may have never had before.

These elements combined create a foundation for emotional processing, self-discovery, and rebuilding a sense of self after experiencing the trauma of partner betrayal.

5. What characteristics define the leadership within these support groups, and how do they contribute to the overall effectiveness of the group in facilitating healing and growth among its members?

Effective leaders in Partners in Process groups possess the following characteristics:

• Personal experience:  Mentors have themselves walked through the Twelve Step process, providing genuine understanding and empathy.
• Compassion and support:  Leaders offer a safe and encouraging space for women to share their struggles.
• Betrayal trauma-informed: Each of the mentors have an understanding of betrayal trauma.
• Knowledge of the Twelve Steps:  They possess a deep understanding of the program and its application to the specific context of sexual addiction.
• Leadership Training and support: The Partners in Process leaders meet regularly for training and coaching. There is support for leaders available whenever needed.

These qualities allow leaders to effectively guide the group, provide practical support, and foster an environment conducive to individual healing and growth.